3:45 p.m. - 2011-03-15
can you spare a couple of million?
soo...i'm getting married and all that jazz. weddings are really, really stupid.
have you people even priced these things? if you're single and want to get married one day, start saving.
i mean, a dress alone is going to probably cost you your first born child. i mean, its JUST a dress. you're never going to wear it again. i just want a cheap dress. is that so much to ask for?
i have been to a few wedding shops when my future mother in law has success in dragging me into one. and they just make my head hurt.
apparently girls with big boobs have a hard time finding dresses.
also, the fact that i'm 4'10 doesn't help either.
any type of dress that i put on either squishes my boobs to the point where my neck has cleavage or it's so long that i look like a little kid playing dress up.
blasphemy. how do all the chicks with huge boobs do it? and i'm talking real boobs. none of the fake ones.
fake ones are just, ugh. why would you want to give yourself back problems? though in all honesty you're probably on your back most of the time anyway.
and if you have fake boobs and are reading this, lets be honest, you probably weren't bright enough to get that joke anyway.
yeah, yeah, yeah. you say you did it so your shirts would fit better. you did it because you're a whore.
you forgot because you're stupid.
what was my point?
Oh! yeah, i need a really rich person to like walk up to me and give me a bunch of money. just for being me.
than we can chit chat for a bit. then i'll run out of things to say and walk away. it will be awkward for a little bit but i'll make sure to keep in touch. i swear they will always be on my christmas card list.
which will stand for something; when i start actually sending out christmas cards.
so yeah...
gimmie you're money, rich people.
-exits stage left-
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